Happy & smile & Laugh & all thetime

"I didn't need the money so badly then."

Oncetwo hunters went hunting in the forest. One of them suddenly fell down byaccident. He showed the whites of his eyes and seemed to have ceased breathing.The other hunter soon took out his mobile phone to call the emergency centerfor help. The operator said calmly “First, you should make sure that he isalready dead.”Then the operator heard a gunshot from the other end of the phoneand next he heard the hunter asking “what should I do next? ”

A man goes to church and startstalking to God. 

He said “God, what is a milliondollars to you?”

God says “A penny.” then the mansays “God, what is a million years to you?”

God says “ A second.” the man says“ God, can I have a penny?”

God says “in a second.”

An Englishman an Irishman and aScotsman are driving through the desert when the car breaks down. They decidethey have to abandon the vehicle but take parts off of the car to survive thejourney. The Englishman goes and takes the radiator. "at least I can havea drink of water to keep me going" The Irishman says "fuck it I'lltake the chair, at least I'll have something to rest myself on". TheScotsman steps up and begins removing the front door...the two lads puzzledlook at him and say "what's the story? what on earth will you do with adoor..??!!the Scotsman looks up ."at least when it gets too hot I'll beable to let a window down".

one day, a father and his little son were going home. at this age, the boywas interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. now, heasked, "what's the meaning of the word 'drunk', dad?" "well, myson," his father replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. ifi regard the two policemen as four then i am drunk." "but, dad,"the boy said, " there's only one policeman!"